geeky_agent | Goodbye

Current Music: The time you sweep against will carry you back home

Goodbye

Chris hadn't slept much the night before. She had just lain awake, the fear and guilt keeping her from rest.

She had slept for a few hours in the afternoon. Only to wake up and instantly remember everything that had happened. And everything still to come.

She was lying in bed again. Chris had tried going down to the bar but the idea of trying to hold a conversation and act like everything was ok, was tiring to her. So she came back to her room and got ready for bed.

But sleep was eluding her again so she sat in bed, book in hand, and tried to concentrate on the words.

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Jack makes his way up from the bar, heading not for his own room, but for Chris'. She'd asked him to come talk to her before he left, and he figures tonight is as good a time as any. He doesn't want too many people around when he leaves the bar; their presence, as well as their expressions, might make Kim suspicious.

He takes a deep breath and knocks on the door.

Chris looks up from the book when she hears a knock on the door. Her first thought is that it's Jack and she almost hopes it isn't because that means he's leaving soon.

She slips her robe on as she walks towards the door and ties it loosely around her waist. A deep breath and she opens the door.

"Hi." He's leaving.

She's dressed in her bathrobe, and for a moment all he can think of is the last time he saw her in it, and of everything that came before that.

"Hi. Can I come in?" he says, feeling a little nervous. He doesn't want to have to say tell her this, but then he thinks he should probably try and get used to it--he'll be saying it a lot tomorrow.

"Yeah," she says quietly and steps aside so he can enter.

He walks in, waiting for her to close the door before speaking.

"Chase got back tonight." He knows he doesn't have to explain what that means, after their discussion last night. But somehow when he'd told her his plan, he'd never imagined he'd have to be saying this so soon.

She nods and feels like she's being suffocated, it's so hard to breathe right now.

"So, tomorrow then."

He nods. "Yeah. Probably tomorrow night. I don't want a lot of people around when I go though. Kim..." he swallows, trying to keep his composure, but it's a struggle. "Kim might get suspicious. She already is."

He's struck by the weight of the burden he's placed on everyone else; soon he won't have to worry about not telling Kim, but everyone else in the bar will have to keep the secret for much longer. Not for the first time he wonders if she should tell her, but he knows he can't do it.

Please, God, let me come back here, if only so people don't have to keep it a secret for very long. So I can tell her myself.

Kim doesn't know. It made sense. How could he tell her what was going to happen and then let her go back to wait till however long to live it out?

"I understand."

He looks down for a moment, taking a deep breath to steady himself. "Anyway, so I just wanted to come by to say goodbye."

I don't want to say goodbye.

She walks over to where he's standing and gently places a hand on his arm.

"If you want, you can stay with me tonight," she whispers.

He looks at her curiously for a moment. Though she'd said she ahd liked being with him the other night--that she'd been happy--she'd also pretty much said she thought it was a mistake.

He wants to say yes, though he knows part of that is because he just doesn't want to be alone tonight, part is because he wants to live as much as he can while he's still here. But part is also because he cares about her, and because he doesn't want to say goodbye either. He's not exactly sure how he feels about her, but dammit, he doesn't have time to figure that out anymore. He just doesn't have any more time.

"Are you sure that's what wat you want? Don't consider me at all; just tell me if this is really what you want."

Chris was aware of what she was doing. It was another betrayal and she may very well regret it later.

But she would regret it now if she didn't. She wanted to feel his skin against hers one more time. Wanted to fall asleep in his arms again.

"It is," she says, taking his hand.

He knows there are hundreds of reasons why he should refuse. But if he does, will he spend the next three months wishing he hadn't?

And more importantly, he doesn't want to. He wants to have one more night with her. And if she's sure she can live with the consequences...

"Me too," he says softly, stepping closer so he can wrap his arms around her.

Chris moves closer and takes some comfort in his arms around her. She brushes her fingertips along his jaw and a smile briefly passes on her lips.

She leans in and lightly kisses him on the lips.

He kisses her back, trying to memorise the feel, the taste of her for when he leaves. It's almost making it harder to keep his resolution of leaving the next day, but he knows he can't waver on that point. He has to go through with it.

He breaks the kiss, resting his head on top of hers, needing a moment to calm down. He keeps his arma wrapped tightly around her, though; right now he doesn't want to let her go.

She looks up at him and her hand comes to rest alongside his face. Chris gently strokes his cheek with her thumb and tries not to think about what's coming tomorrow. Or what came before.

He opens his eyes again, give her a weak smile before turning his head to kiss her palm, her wrist, skipping up to where her neck meets her shoulder. He can hear her breathing, can feel the warmth of her body, and he wants to savour it as long as possible.

His smile almost makes Chris cry but instead she focuses on the way his lips feel on her skin.

She turns her head and kisses him on the mouth. The next kiss is deeper and hungrier. She wants to remember this and forget everything else.

He tries to push all his thoughts about what's going to happen out of his mind and concentrate on kissing her back.

But he can't do it completely, and there's a desperation to his kiss, a desire to make this night last as long as possible, because what'l happen tomorrow and in the days afterward doesn't bear thinking about.

His kiss seems a little fiercer and maybe a little more desperate so she wraps her arms around him.

He holds her tightly, forcing himself to relax has she slips her arms around him. They have tonight to be together, and that will have to be enough. No anticipating the morning just yet; it'll come soon enough.

He slides his hands down over her curves until they meet the sash of her robe, and he tugs to loosen the knot there.

Morning can wait.

fade to black

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Goodbye

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